So, I’m unemployed for the first time in my life. Apart from being a student and having the odd gaps between study and proper ‘grown-up’ jobs, this last week has been the first time I’ve ever had to think about the structure of my day aside from the usual getting up, eating, washing, sleeping and checking my emails, as I do first thing anyway. Besides the very important job-hunting, there’s little else to do and being essentially a very social person who needs other people to bounce off, I’m finding these long daytimes don’t exactly stimulate me.
On the other hand, it feels strangely like being eighteen again, in that long hot summer before university started. Well, it might not have been that long and hot, but everything looks rosier in retrospect! I had my mum’s car at my disposal, plenty of friends in the same position and what seemed like unbridled freedom. I hadn’t got a care in the world and a hugely exciting three years of being away from home ahead of me.
Seven years on I’m lucky to have been able to shape my life quite happily, and I’ve reaped the benefits of being a bit more sorted and with somewhat more direction in my life. Leaving my last job was a temporary setback – perhaps knocking my self-belief somewhat – but it was the right thing to do and those eight months have now been safely deposited in the dustbin of history. At least I’ve got the time and mental space to meaningfully look for something else. Every morning I’m getting quite excited by the prospect of working for more dynamic and exciting organisations, so there’s hope yet. And a holiday in a few weeks time should help recharge my batteries even more, in preparation for the next challenge.
This evening I’ll be doing my volunteering at the London Lesbian and Gay Switchboard, which I’m looking forward to, as I’ve not done a shift in a few weeks. At least I can listen to other peoples' problems on the phones in the knowledge that my worries aren’t all that bad!
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